Author Topic: Funny Quotations  (Read 3986 times)

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Offline Alpha_baloch

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Funny Quotations
« on: May 16, 2005, 02:01:19 AM »
When I'm not in my right mind, my left mind gets pretty crowded.


I used to have an open mind but my brains kept falling out.

No matter how hard you try, you can't teach physics to a dog.
WHO CAN DEFEAT A NATION(MUSLIMS)WHICH KNOWS HOW TO PLAY HIDE AND SEEK WITH DEATH

Offline Alpha_baloch

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Funny Quotations
« Reply #1 on: May 17, 2005, 01:59:39 AM »
Wealthy people miss one of life's greatest thrills . . . Making the last car payment.

If Barbie is so popular, why do you have to buy her friends?

When your dreams turn to dust, it's time to vacuum.

Good judgment comes from bad experience, and a lot of that comes from bad judgment.

Always remember you're unique. Just like everyone else.

Don't be irreplaceable. If you can't be replaced, you can't be promoted.

The quickest way to double your money is to fold it in half and put it back in your pocket.

WHO CAN DEFEAT A NATION(MUSLIMS)WHICH KNOWS HOW TO PLAY HIDE AND SEEK WITH DEATH

Offline DesertRose

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Funny Quotations
« Reply #2 on: May 17, 2005, 10:57:03 AM »
Hi Brother

Nice Quotes please post some more  :)
Wisdom is not in words; Wisdom is meaning within words !!! Wisdom ceases to be wisdom...... when it become too Proud to Weep,, too grave to Laugh,, too self-full to see other than it self !!! Khalil Gibran

Offline Rind Baba

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Funny Quotations
« Reply #3 on: May 17, 2005, 07:02:39 PM »
WILL SOMEONE PLEASE EXPLAIN TO ME WHY I WANT YOU?
 :x:x EVERYONE SAYS IM TO GOOD FOR YOU AND IM STARTING TO BELIEVE ITS TRUE
You can chain me, you can torture me, you can even destroy this body, but you will never imprison my mind.

Long Live Baloch & Balochistan

Offline Alpha_baloch

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« Reply #4 on: May 18, 2005, 02:04:21 AM »
Never miss a good chance to shut up.

Life is cheap. It's the accessories that kill you.

Sometimes i think i am a genius. Then i realize I've already seen this episode of jeopardy.

Sure the Grand Canyon may be breathtaking but so is lung cancer

For every complex problem, there is a solution that is simple, neat and wrong

Don't think of death as an ending. Rather, think of it as a really effective way of reducing your expenses.

People who think they know everything are a great annoyance to those of us who really do

Cheaters never prosper, unless they get away with it.
Always look on the bright side of things, because you can't see a damn thing when its dark
 :mrgreen:

Give me the strength to change the things I can, the grace to accept the things i cannot, and a great big bag of money.

I like nonsense, it awakens the brain cells.

If you aren't part of the solution, you're a precipitate
WHO CAN DEFEAT A NATION(MUSLIMS)WHICH KNOWS HOW TO PLAY HIDE AND SEEK WITH DEATH

Offline Zahida Raees Raji

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Funny Quotations
« Reply #5 on: May 18, 2005, 12:32:42 PM »
:)  :>  :mrgreen:  :x
Zahida Raees :Raji:
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Offline Abdullah

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« Reply #6 on: May 18, 2005, 05:02:52 PM »


"The direct use of force is such a poor solution to any problem,
it is generally employed only by small children and large nations."
(-- David Friedman)

"It's better to be silent and be thought a fool,
than to speak and remove all doubt."
(-- Mark Twain)

"I know Kung Fu, Karate, and 47 other dangerous words."
(-- Jo Ramos)

I know they say love is blind, but does it also have to be deaf, dumb, and stupid?
(--unknown)

A good way to threaten somebody is to light a stick of dynamite.
Then you call the guy and hold the burning fuse up to the phone.
"Hear that?" you say. "That's dynamite, baby."
(--unknown)

Anyalyzing humour is like dissecting a frog:
nobody enjoys it, and the frog usually dies as a result.
(--unknown)

Sir, if you were my husband, I would poison your drink. (--Lady Astor to Winston Churchill)
Madam, if you were my wife, I would drink it. (-- His reply)

You spend your whole life believing that you're on the right track,
only to discover that you're on the wrong train.
(--unknown)

Maturity is knowing when and where to be immature.
(--unknown)

:)

Abdullah

Offline Alpha_baloch

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« Reply #7 on: May 19, 2005, 02:10:30 AM »
The number-one fear in life is public speaking, and the number-two fear is death. This means that if you go to a funeral, you're better off in the casket than giving the eulogy.

They say hot dogs can kill you. How do you know it's not the bun?

Always go to other people's funerals, otherwise they won't come to yours.

My father wanted me to have all the educational opportunities he never had... so he sent me to a girls school.

Doing nothing is very hard to do...you never know when you're finished.

I love your smile, your face, and your eyes - ****, I'm good at telling lies!

 see your face when I am dreaming. That's why I always wake up screaming.

My feelings for you no words can tell, Except for maybe "Go to hell."

I'm not saying my wife's a bad cook, but she uses a smoke alarm as a timer.

What's a geriatric? A german footballer scoring three goals

Sometimes I think war is God's way of teaching us geography

There are three types of people in this world: those who make things happen, those who watch things happen and those who wonder what happened.

If you try and don't succeed, cheat. Repeat until caught. Then lie.

Before I criticize someone, I walk a mile in their shoes. That way, if they get angry, they are a mile away and barefoot.

You can get more of what you want with a kind word and a gun than you can with just a kind word.

When I die, I want to die like my grandmother, who died peacefully in her sleep. Not screaming like all the passengers in her car.

WHO CAN DEFEAT A NATION(MUSLIMS)WHICH KNOWS HOW TO PLAY HIDE AND SEEK WITH DEATH

Offline Alpha_baloch

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Funny Quotations
« Reply #8 on: May 20, 2005, 02:44:34 AM »
There is a fine line between fishing and just standing on the shore like an idiot.

People will believe anything if you whisper it.

You know you're old when the candles cost more than the cake.

If practice makes perfect, and no one is perfect, why practice?

I'm a nobody, nobody is perfect, therefore I am perfect!
WHO CAN DEFEAT A NATION(MUSLIMS)WHICH KNOWS HOW TO PLAY HIDE AND SEEK WITH DEATH